The Keys

About five years ago I was a slave of my own complacency.  I ate too much.  I drank too much.  I worked and tried to be a good parent and hubbie but really didn’t do much more than that.  I watched a lot of sports on television.  I watched a lot of television in general.  I was bored and unready to make changes in my life…until I came back from a vacation and saw pictures of me and the shape that I had gotten into.  It was a wake up call.  It turns out that Dean Wormer from Animal House was right.  “Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life.”

I was tired of sitting on the sidelines….watching the athletes on TV…not taking part in anything.  Long story short, I began running.  OK…I had always been sort of an off and on runner.  Now I made the commitment.  I dropped weight.  I drank less.  I didn’t eat less but could now justify the additional helpings.  Things changed.  I changed.

It was a process.  Nothing happens overnight.  I had to change my way of thinking.  One of the reasons I was an off and on again runner was I would go balls out from the beginning and inevitably hurt myself and take a prolonged layoff before starting again.  This time was different.  I started slow.  It was as much about changing my mental state as it was changing my physical state.  Through the process I became a runner, I became more mentally tough, and I became a better person.

That was five years or so ago.  I am still a changed man.  I still run.  I have not packed the pounds back on.  I spend a lot less time in front of the television and happy to be taking part in my life as opposed to watching life pass me by from the sidelines.  However, once again I feel the itch to make changes…to improve on life.  Once again, it involves living life more fully but this time I think it will be an all mental game.

I feel the need to change.  I have flaws…a lot of them…but I am a work in progress.  It’s time to teach the old dog new tricks and I am not entirely sure how to do it except to make the commitment and continue to improve as the days go on.  Though I think I am a pretty positive person, I feel that POSITIVITY is the key to living the fullest possible life

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When I started taking my running seriously I followed a certain set of rules for myself that would help me achieve my goals.  Just basic stuff: eating healthier, running regularly, not being a complete lush, etc.  I didn’t write the rules down but I knew what they were.  This time I am making a list so I can refer to it when I am faltering…a little reminder of the track I am supposed to be on.  Some items are things that I try to put into practice and some are things that I fail at but all are geared towards making my own little world a better place.

1.       Be thankful.

2.       Be kind.

3.       Be joyful.

4.       Treat each new day as a new opportunity.

5.       Try different things.

6.       Forgive.

7.       Don’t sweat the small stuff.

8.       Practice openness.

9.       Listen to music.

10.   Read books.

Being thankful.  I am just as guilty as anyone for forgetting what it is all about.  I am lucky in what I have.  I have all I need and there are a lot of people who don’t have that.  I need to try to think about this every morning when I wake up.  Some thankfulness with my cup of coffee.

Being kind.  I suppose I am a pretty kind person.  I try to help people out when I can and I don’t go out of my way to be mean.  However (and this is something I work on) I can get sucked into the negative vortex of trash talking people that piss me off.  It isn’t helpful and I need to stop doing it.

Being joyful.  This is what everything is all about.  It shouldn’t be hard but as I get older it feel s that the weights of the world do get heavier.  Work pressures are unceasing and the bills don’t stop coming in but it is the same for most and it’s time I started being conscious of how I am feeling.  A bad mood can be pretty sneaky if it goes unchecked.  There is a lot to be happy about and I need to remember that.

A new day, a new opportunity.  This is another area I struggle in.  Getting up for another day at work can be difficult.  There are a lot of variables that I can’t control.  I need to treat those variable for what they are and concentrate on what I can control.  I need to look at each day as a new opportunity to learn and have fun.

Try different things.  I started doing this a few years ago.  Whenever I wind up at a half decent or nice restaurant I try something new.  Variety is the spice of life and who knows what you are missing when you don’t take a chance on something different.  Mixing things up a bit in life makes things more fun and interesting.

Forgive.  I am pretty good at this but there is always room for improvement.  Forgiving doesn’t mean you have to forget that people have wronged you.  It just means that you can let it go.  Why do I want to carry a burden of hatred or hurt because of the actions of someone else.  All that does is make my life harder.

Don’t sweat it.  Sometimes I am good at this and sometimes I fail.  I need to remember it…especially with my kids.  I guess pressures build up and everyone flips out over the small things on occasion but I want to stop doing this.  When I get frustrated I need to give myself a timeout before I react.  Generally, the small things, though they build up, are not worth getting worked up about.

Openness.  This is a difficult concept for me.  When I get mad at someone or just feel someone isn’t worth my energy I shut down and close up…not just with that person but across the board.  I need to get past the individual events and just be more open to other people’s ideas or thoughts

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Music.  What more needs to be said.  More music.  Less television.  It calms the savage beast.

Books.  Expand the mind and the imagination.  Don’t let someone else tell you how to view the world.  Reading allows you to explore unknown worlds and because it is only words, you can picture it without bias (or at least without someone else’s bias.)

That’s it.  A ten point plan for better living.  I feel that if I can improve in these areas I will become a happier person…which will make me a better person.